While reviewing my papers, which included my birth date: "You're a bit old to be having a baby." (Um, really?)
"You and your husband waited a while to have kids." (Not really. Cate was born before we'd been married 16 months. Not to get in to the thick of the math, but ...)
"Are you sure you want this electric field so close to your baby?" (What? "Electric field?" Isn't it just an electric blanket on low under some sheets? I think it will be fine.)
"Does your back always get this red while you're getting a massage?" (Not sure. No one's ever mentioned it.)
"Do you do your own toenails?" (As you can see, since you are massaging my feet, no one has done my toenails in way too long.)
"You should do your own toenails. The fumes in those places are really bad for you. Those people who work there, they have lots of health problems." (Oh?)
"Did you doctor tell you to get a massage?" (Nope, just thought it would be a nice treat and really appreciate my friend for sharing her massage credits with me.)
"One time I went to the hospital and gave all the doctors free massages. I bet those doctors tell their patients to get massages." (No doubt.)
And my favorite, to the receptionist as I was leaving:
"Now, I'd like to see her back in about three weeks." (I bet you would. Who are you, the dentist?)
My neck is feeling great, and so is my funny bone. Thanks again, Monica!!
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